Lord Vader these Crystalists are a pesky bunch!
And we C their numbers growing.
We must act Swiftly to supress them.
If not, they’ll become a Haskell to contend with.
Shall we unleash the demon Python upon them?
Or is there another way we must Go?
No, let’s get down to the Basics of what we must do.
We must call the Assembly together to decide.
Madam Ada will not save us now, neither Lord Pascal.
We should have crushed them as Rubyist when we had the chance.
Or even when they were mere Perls.
We did not C# enough the threat they posed.
Now they go Forth and prosper.
Yeh, we became complacent and Rusted in over confidence.
And it’s too late to run a Java thru them, or Dart them now.
And I fear it’s even too late to Pony up an army to defeat them.
No, we must use guile and cunning. The Genie is out the box.
We must learn their Lingo and try to Modula and weaken it.
But R we up to the task, or is this just much Smalltalk?
If we wait too long our Postscript will be already written.
No, I do not speak with a Lisp!
We must put our own SPIN on it, and confuse its users.
Then it will fracture and SNOBOL into obscurity.
That is our only chance, so we must git to its Source.
Yes, yes, the thought Tcls me. I C++ it clearly now.
But we cannot Zig this up!
Yes, we only have one Nim of chance as it is.
And we must account for all Factors.
Vala awaits us if we fail…
(to be continued…)